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Staying CloseStaying Close By Dennis & Barbara RaineyAre you living alone - in the same home as your spouse? Dennis and Barbara provide workable strategies for defeating isolation and keeping your marriage vital and intimate.

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Cleaving Guests include: Dennis RaineyToday on the broadcast, Dennis Rainey explains what it means to cleave to your spouse. More Loneliness and isolation broadcasts
10 Ideas: Prayers for an Unbelieving Spouse

June Sims

The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much.
–James 5:16b

After 34 years of marriage, my husband, Lamar, announced that he wanted a divorce. “I don’t love you,” he said. “I don’t need you. I don’t want you.”

I was devastated.

“Either you get a divorce or I will,” Lamar said. “I’m sick of hearing about God.”

I told Lamar that I couldn’t file for divorce. 

“Well, just leave me alone,” he said.

And I did.

I knew that I was powerless to change my husband’s unbelieving heart—only the Lord could do that. Through God’s amazing mercy and grace, our marriage and Lamar’s soul were saved.

The following are 10 prayers that I prayed for my husband. You may not face the same situation as I did, but if you have an unbelieving spouse, these prayers can help you focus on the God who changes hearts. (Just substitute the name of your spouse.)

1. “Lord, may Your wise and knowing Spirit rest on Lamar. Be Lamar’s counselor. May Lamar delight in You and obey Your commands. Convict Lamar of sin, the righteousness of Jesus Christ, and of the coming judgment.” (Isaiah 11:2-3)

2. “God, You will fulfill the purpose in each of our lives. Your love endures forever—do not abandon the works of Your hands. Do not abandon Lamar. Draw him to You.” (Psalm 138:8)

3. “Bring Lamar to the end of himself and into a living, vital, intimate, overpowering relationship with Jesus Christ. Open his eyes that he may see wonderful things in Your law.” (Psalm 119:18) 

4. “Your hands made Lamar and formed him; give Lamar understanding to learn Your commands.” (Psalm 119:73)

5. “Bless Lamar. Your Word says that Your kindness leads to repentance. Don’t allow Lamar to continue to store up wrath for himself.” (Romans 2:4-6)

6. “Lamar’s heart is in Your hand; You direct it like a watercourse where You please. I can trust You.” (Proverbs 21:1)

7. “Give Lamar singleness of heart and action so that he will always fear You for his own good and the good of our children.” (Jeremiah 32:39)

8. “Instruct Lamar and teach him in the way he should go. Counsel Lamar and watch over him. Your unfailing love surrounds the one who trusts in You.” (Psalm 32:8, 10)

9. “Help Lamar to humble himself under Your mighty hand, that You may lift him up in due time.” (1 Peter 5:6)

10. “I pray a hedge of thorns around Lamar, that those with wrong influence will lose interest and leave him alone. I pray this in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the power of His blood.” (Hosea 2:6)

Editor’s Note: To learn more about June Sims, read the article, “Her Husband Wouldn’t Talk to Herfor Three Years.”

Related articles
Praying for Your Wife by John Yates
Thirty Ways to Pray for Your Husband by Stormie Omartian
Twenty Ways to Pray for Your Wife by Stormie Omartian

Related resources
Surviving a Spiritual Mismatch in Marriage by Lee and Leslie Strobel
When He Doesn't Believe by Nancy Kennedy
Lifting My Husband Through Prayer (prayer card) 
Lifting My Wife Through Prayer (prayer card)


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Comments:
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Anonymous @ 5/25/2009 7:14:25 PM 
Yes words do hurt.That is when you see their true colors.A counselor told me to get over it, not be so sensitive.

God has called you to live in peace.For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?
Anonymous @ 5/14/2009 9:01:10 AM 
I am having the same problem. My husband is a soldier who is deployed to Afghanistan right now and after 3 deployments and 6 years of marriage he calls to tell me he is not happy and wants a divorce. That he just simply fell out of love with me. I have prayed everyday that we work through this as I believe we are just going thru a tough time. I love him with all my heart, and I admit I have not always been the most affectionate wife because of self-esteem issues but I have always loved him. I am finally waking up after all of this and realizing we both need to change. I don't know where to turn to at this point, because in 5 days he gets back on a plane to finish up the rest of his tour. He wants to stay married for the next 6 months so we can pay off debts with his extra deployment money but that is very hard for me. It is also scary to thinkabout what will happen during those 6 months. All I ask is for God to please answer my prayers and to help both of us through this.
Anonymous @ 4/30/2009 5:50:40 AM 
I came across the ten prayers about one week ago and have faithfully been praying it daily. My husband too has said he wants to leave. A devastating shock after 18 years of marriage. I am keeping my faith with the help of these prayers and I pray that you do too. I've read and heard many times, we must not be anxious. God will provide to us, we must be patient.
Anonymous @ 3/30/2009 7:09:52 PM 
The day after my 32nd b-day my husband announced to me that he is no longer in love with me and wants a divorce. We have been married for 5 1/2 years, we have had issue after issue, now the problem is trust. Due to his lack of outwardly love and affection towards me, I started talking to an old friend on the phone. Now my husband doesn't trust me. I just pray that this too shall pass. I pray that his trust for me grows back over time. I pray that he stops asking me to leave. I pray that he stays committed to me and this marriage. He knows the covenant that he made with God, but his reply was, "I'm not perfect & this will not be the only sin I have committed, so God will forgive me." Nothing I say or do for him changes his mind. So prayer is the answer. I know God will provide. Please pray for me as I will pray for all of you & your marriages
Anonymous @ 3/16/2009 12:25:13 PM 
Thank you soooooooo much for these 10 short prayers. My heart has been aching, praying, and blubbering because of too much strife in my marriage. Because of my husband's habit of cursing at me, to me and about me or anyone else, I asked God over and over again about what I must do. He has screamed everything from "I dont want you" to "You are a failure". Sometimes, I end up yelling too for obvious reasons, just cant stand it anymore. I am too tired to cry and can only seem to eek out "Jesus, help." I am only a half day into my fast just seeking God's direction and lo and behold I run across these short prayers. Thank you! I am committed to doing only what God says.
Anonymous @ 2/23/2009 8:22:41 PM 
Thank you so much for this. I thought I was the only one who has ever been in this situation, but I have discovered so many testimonies online of wives whose husbands left and it looked like all was lost, BUT THEN GOD intervened! It gives me so much hope and encouragement to read about how God moved in others' lives and it helps me to pray that God will redeem and restore my marriage. Right now he is convinced that he wants a divorce and is going to file when he gets up the money, but I know that God is working. He is working on me, to help me forgive and I know He is working on my husband, even if it doesn't always show outwardly.
Anonymous @ 2/2/2009 11:11:56 PM 
thank you for your encouragement. My husband has told me he no longer loves me or has feeling for me. he has moved out to his parents and left myself and a 9 month old and 2 year old after 9 years of marraige. please pray that the Lord will guide him to make the choice to keep his family.
Anonymous @ 1/31/2009 1:19:28 PM 
Thank you and God Bless you for sharing your story. The Lord is awesome and although we may want our husbands to believe in Him, only God can make it happen. But prayer is the best weapon that we have against the enemy. My prayers go out to the fellow wifes of unbelieving husbands. My husband and I had a blowup last night - over the food I tried to cook. I have been praying for him and I know that the Lord will one day turn his heart to Himself. My husband ws raised a Catholic as was I. I was converted as a child. My husband has lost his faith and now drinks whenever he is under stress. I pray for him and because the Lord is so good to my sons and I, he is still living with us. Although he has threatened to leave- he does this when he has been drinking alot, like last night. Fellow wives, please pray for my marriage and my husband's salvation. Thank you and God Bless you all.
Anonymous @ 1/22/2009 11:00:10 AM 
Thanks for the 10 prayers to say. I got rebaptized in 2007 and been following christ and now I want my husband to follow with me but he is not interested. We we're raised Catholic and I didn't learn anything, so I was introduce to a non denomination church and I love it now. I love prasing the lord. My husband is not there and need prayer for him. I leave him alone and pray that one day he will follow. Thank you for your encouraging story.
Anonymous @ 1/22/2009 2:45:51 AM 
Thank you for sharing such a private matter. My husband has not left our home but he is not here. He takes us out to keep us happy but he has no joy and wishes he'd stayed alone in life. He has given up on God and now says he doesn't even think he believes anymore. I pray often that The Father will bring him home again and that they can have the relationship they used to have. My prayers are now with you all too.
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